Maybe I should stop being so oblivious and start considering other people. I’ve been so caught up with just not trying to make you mad that I don’t even give myself a chance to truly get to know him. You didn’t think about how I would feel when you did those things. So why I am I being considerate of you.

LED is the same weekend haha. I guess as long as I’m distracted and drugged out it’s okay then.

Perks of a relationship without the relationship. I’m still unhappy because at the end of the day I’m still a girl lol I may think like a guy sometimes but I’m still a girl I still want to be loved. And I guess I’m unhappy because I know everything between us the kisses on the forehead, the intimacy, all of that is faked.
All I’ve ever wanted in my life was to be loved for real. To not be lied to, cheated on, to be worth the respect and truth. so I guess this is the best it’ll get. Better to have you in my life than not have you at all. I hate how much I’ve let myself fall for you since the beginning. At least I know at one point even if it was really short you did love me. So if it’s a ” I care for you ” now, it’s okay.

I haven’t heard you say it in so long that it hurts just thinking about it because I know they weren’t real.tonight made me question why I keep holding back for you. I put you priority before my friends but why? What for? What you can offer is not enough so do I walk away or do I accept it. I accept it now because I have hope but the usual you always gives me false hope.

Well that was probably the awkwardest first hangout ever. Men and their shallow intentions sigh. It’s funny when they try to hold my hand and I have to say I’m dating someone when really I’m not LOL. So wtf am I doing. Keeping you from getting mad.but technically I’m not even yours. And you were never mine to begin with

I still hope, and the day it doesn’t happen is the day I know it wasn’t meant to be. Then I’ll stop and I won’t turn back this time.

R u flirting with me?…. Lol no. Bye

But i guess as long as youre in my life i’m blessed.whatever we are i guess i’m okay with it. you were never one to commit anyway so i shouldnt expect anything anyway.

it makes me painfully happy to see you.

He said I was really smart (‘: it honestly meant so much to me coming from you. Tbh coming from a student who’s going to ucla it really meant a lot to me. I thought you would be the one to judge me the most since we grew up together. And you tried hard while I slacked off like hell. But when you said” tbh I think you’re really smart. You always have smart remarks to say in class” idk it was small but it tells me at least my grades don’t necessarily say I’m going to be a failure in life. I just need to live up to my potential now.